January, Diets, and Letting Go of Who I Thought I Should Be
- 6 days ago
- 5 min read
Today’s blog comes from Naomi Holbrook, founder of The Unconventional Weightloss Coach and a valued Connected100 member.
In this deeply personal reflection, Naomi shares why January no longer needs to be loud, punishing, or rooted in fixing ourselves. Drawing on her own lived experience, her work with women in midlife, and her connection to Brighton, she explores what it really means to approach health, business, and life with kindness, honesty, and compassion — and why doing things the unconventional way can be quietly transformative.
January has always been loud for me.
Loud with expectations.
Loud with “this year will be different.”
Loud with pressure to fix myself.
For as long as I can remember, January meant a new diet, a new plan, a new version of me that was finally going to get it right. Health sorted. Career elevated. Relationship secured. Life all neatly boxed and labelled.
Spoiler: it never quite worked out like that.
These days, January feels very different: calmer, kinder, and far less shouty. This change says a lot about me, my business, and why I am reconnecting locally here in Brighton.
I’m Naomi Holbrook, founder of The Unconventional Weightloss Coach and creator of the SMART formula.
I help women, particularly in midlife to heal their relationship with food, their bodies, and themselves. Yes, weight loss often happens. But it’s never the main event. Freedom, energy, confidence, and peace are.
I live and work in Brighton (well - Hove Actually!) a city that somehow manages to be both grounding and electric at the same time. I moved here in 2011 because I needed space to breathe, a fresh start and because something about the sea always has a way of reminding you who you are when you’ve forgotten.
Brighton is woven into my work. The openness. The diversity. The willingness to question “the norm.” It’s a city that welcomes people who don’t quite fit in neat boxes - and honestly, that’s most of the women I work with, including myself.
Why I Started This Work
I didn’t start my business because I loved the wellness industry.
I started it because I survived it.
For nearly 30 years, I lived in cycles of dieting, emotional & disordered eating, body shame, and self-blame. I was highly functioning on the outside - career, responsibilities, “doing life” while inside I was exhausted, disconnected, and constantly trying to be better, thinner, calmer, more acceptable.
January was always my reset button.
And also my biggest source of disappointment.
Every year I promised myself I’d stick to the plan this time. Every year I quietly decided that I was the problem when it didn’t last.
At 39, with chronic pain, pre-diabetes, depression, anxiety, and a body that felt like it was constantly working against me, something shifted. Not in a dramatic “new year, new me” way, but in a quieter, braver one.
I stopped asking, “What diet should I do?”
And started asking, “Why am I so at war with myself?”
That question changed my life, slowly but surely.
One of the greatest privileges of my work is witnessing women come home to themselves.
I’ve watched clients:
Wear shorts for the first time in their lives
Rebuild intimacy in relationships they thought were beyond repair
Come off medication they believed they’d need forever
Stop waiting for “after January” to start living
But the moments that stay with me most aren’t dramatic transformations - they’re quiet sentences like:
“I feel like myself again.”
“I didn’t realise how lost I was.”
“This feels like freedom … finally.”
Those moments never tire and always anchor me back to what I do, and importantly why.
What’s Changing in My Industry (and why it matters to me)
The health and weight loss space is loud right now.
Quick fixes. Injections. Extremes. Old diet culture dressed up in a new language.
While innovation can be powerful, I’m also seeing a worrying return to fear-based messaging - particularly for women in midlife. More pressure. More shame. More urgency to “fix” ourselves before it’s too late.
I stay grounded by following the science; particularly behaviour change, neuroplasticity, and nervous system regulation - but also by listening deeply to women. Real women, living real lives, juggling careers, ageing parents, children, grief, menopause, and everything in between.
Trends come and go.
Human needs don’t.
Challenges I’ve Faced (and what they’ve taught me)
Building a business rooted in compassion, honesty, and depth isn’t always the fastest route.
There were times I was told I needed to be louder, more polished, more “aspirational.”
There were times I questioned whether being this honest was a risk.
One of my biggest challenges has been unlearning the need to prove myself and trusting that the right people will feel my work, not just consume it.
That decision changed me.
If I could offer one piece of advice to anyone starting out in this space, it would be this:
Don’t build a business that costs you your nervous system.
Success that comes at the expense of your health, values, or integrity isn’t success - it’s just a glorified form of burnout.
Three Things That Have Changed Everything for Me
Here are three simple (but powerful) principles I live and work by:
1. Stop waiting for motivation
Motivation is unreliable. Systems, self-trust, and support are far more effective.
2. Build around your real life
If your approach doesn’t work on a bad day, it doesn’t work. Full stop.
3. Let go of who you think you ‘should’ be
This one took me the longest. Yet it gave me the most freedom.
These principles aren’t just for health - they apply to business, relationships, and life.
A Different Kind of January
This year, January isn’t about becoming someone new.
It’s about continuing to be someone real.
At nearly 51, I’ve finally taken “find a partner” off my New Year’s goal list - not because I’ve given up, but because my life already feels full, meaningful, and aligned. That alone feels like a quiet revolution from where I once was.
And this is what I want everyone to know:
You don’t need fixing.
You don’t need another extreme plan.
You don’t need to wait for the perfect moment.
Sometimes, the bravest thing you can do is stop pushing - and start listening.
If You Take One Thing From This…
Let it be this:
You’re allowed to start this year differently.
Kinder. Slower. More you.
If reading this sparked something: curiosity, relief, recognition, in my experience, that’s enough. Follow that feeling. It usually knows where to go next.
And if you see me around Brighton, or Hove probably with a coffee in hand and a grin on my face - please say hello. I’m always up for a real conversation.
Here’s to a year of less pressure, more presence, and doing things the unconventional way.
Naomi
Website: The Unconventional Weightloss Coach
Instagram: @naomiholbrookcoach
Facebook: The Unconventional Weightloss Coach
LinkedIn: Naomi Holbrook
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