It didn’t start with coaching. It started with everything falling apart.

Today’s blog comes from Sam Adams, a Brighton-based coach and certified breathwork facilitator who works with business owners, leaders and high performers to help them build sustainable success without burnout. In this deeply personal piece, Sam shares her own journey through loss, burnout and recovery — and how it ultimately shaped the work she does today, supporting others to expand their capacity, reconnect with themselves, and lead in a way that truly works for them.

If you’d met me 6 or 7 years ago, you probably would’ve said I had things pretty sorted.

I’d been working for myself for over 20 years. Started out in small businesses, worked my way into property, renovated houses, built a buy-to-let portfolio. From the outside, it looked solid. And in a lot of ways, it was.

Then I moved into mentoring in the property space. Teaching others how to do what I’d done. And I loved it… but not for the reasons I expected.

It wasn’t the deals or the numbers that lit me up….It was the people.

The conversations. The mindset. The stuff going on underneath the strategy.

That’s what pulled me into coaching.

And without really trying to, I found myself working with business owners, leaders, high performers. People who looked like they had it together… but behind the scenes were carrying a lot.

Which, if I’m honest, I understood more than I realised at the time.

Because in 2019/2020, my world completely fell apart.

My dad died.

My marriage broke down.

My dog passed away.

All within a few months. Quite honestly, it was too much. Simple as that.

I didn’t want to be here anymore. I was shut down, numb one minute, overwhelmed the next. Struggling to get out of bed. Not eating properly. Just trying to get through the day without falling apart.

And the mad thing is… I’d done therapy before. I wasn’t new to “working on myself”. But this was different. This hit my whole system. Therapy wasn’t game changing, I didn’t even want to talk.

Then someone mentioned breathwork.

I remember thinking it sounded like a load of nonsense. Honestly. Proper sceptical. But I was also at a point where I’d try anything.

So I went.

That first session cracked something open. And not in a gentle, relaxing way. I journaled after, and cried and took myself straight to bed.

I felt everything, and it took it out of me, I’m not gonna lie.

Over the next five sessions, I cried more than I think I had in my entire life. Proper, deep, uncomfortable release. A really good bubbly snot cry each time!! The kind you can’t think your way out of.

I grew up in a house where you didn’t really show emotion. Crying wasn’t encouraged. So I’d got very good at holding things in.

I just didn’t realise how much that was costing me.

The breathwork didn’t “fix” anything overnight. It didn’t take the grief away.

But it gave me space. Because I had big releases, of stuck emotions.

It allowed me to have space to feel it without it completely taking me out. Space to start eating again. Getting outside. Being around people.

Bit by bit, I started to come back.

And that’s when things shifted in my work.

Because I couldn’t not bring this in.

So I decided to do the training to become a certified Breathwork Facilitator, I started learning more about the breath, the science behind it, the nervous system. How our state….whether we’re running on stress, shutdown, or actually feeling safe…. drives everything.

Our decisions. Our leadership. Our relationships. Our businesses.

And what I see now, working with leaders all the time, is this:

Most people are trying to build bigger lives on systems that are already overloaded.

They’re running hot. Constantly switched on. Living in stress mode, even if they don’t realise it.

Then they’re wondering why they feel stuck, exhausted, or like it’s all a bit much.

And at the same time… they’re ambitious.

They want more. More impact, more growth, more life.

But their system is already at capacity.

So of course it feels heavy.

That’s the work I do now.

It’s not just about strategy or performance. It’s about capacity.

Can you actually hold the life you’re trying to build?

Can your system handle the pressure, the responsibility, the pace… without it costing you your health, your relationships, or your sense of self?

Because I couldn’t.

Not back then.

Now, everything I do,  from my one-to-one coaching to my leadership cohorts,  is built around that.

We look at how you operate. How you respond under pressure. Where you’re pushing through versus actually supporting yourself properly.

And yeah, we use the breath. Because it’s one of the most powerful tools I’ve found for shifting state and building that capacity.

It’s identity level coaching.  Life changing…. not my words but clients.

I also run community breathwork sessions in Brighton,  which I love. There’s something about doing this work in a room full of people who are all carrying their own stuff, but showing up anyway. There’s real power in that.

If you’re reading this and something’s resonated… maybe you recognise yourself in it.

The driven one. The capable one. The one everyone relies on. Or always feeling in the back foot.

But underneath it, you’re tired. Or stretched. Or just know there’s more in you, but you don’t quite know how to access it without burning yourself out.

You don’t need to keep pushing harder.

There’s another way to do this.

If you want to explore it, you can find me here: sam-adams.com

Or check out my Unbound Leaders Cohort here: https://gift.sam-adams.com/the-unbound-leaders-reprogram-6890

Or just come and connect with me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/samadamscoach/

Sam x

Sam Adams